Ashley graham on becoming a sex symbol,Her life experiences are strong enough to change lives

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She was attracted to  the media  due to the statement  made by her at various  occasions for  this  reason ,a few of  her interviews were  quoted from  below.

In  a series of  interviews she  gave to the  GLAMOUR  Magazine  she quoted facts, in a few words, with  the aim of creating awareness, among the blog readers.

The below essay is adapted from Ashley Graham’s new memoir, A New Model : what confidence , beauty , and power really look like.

Four months into our knowing each other, my now husband , Justin, said, “I really like you, and I really want to be your boyfriend. Will you be my girlfriend?” I said yes. But the truth is, I wasn’t sure. One reason: Our first kiss  was terrible. (To this day Justin says I’m the worst kisser he ever met and that he had to teach me how to kiss.) But the real reason was more complicated and had to do with the cumulative effect of bad relationship  I’d had over the years. Let me give you the backstory.

I started dating at 16. My first boyfriend and I were together for three months, until he said, “I have to break up with you because you won’t have sex with me. And I’m afraid you’re going to be as fat as my mom.” Thus started a pattern of going out with anyone who thought I was hot; I lost my virginity to a guy I barely knew because he gave me compliments like, “Ashley, you look really pretty today,” or, “I like when you wear your hair like that.” (The next day he ignored me in school.) When I left Nebraska to start my modeling career in New York City, my dates followed a similar pattern: A guy took me out, then we had sex, then I wouldn’t hear from him again.

Eventually I joined a church. I didn’t go there to find a boyfriend; I truly wasn’t looking for anyone other than the person I wanted to be. One Sunday my volunteer position was to stand in the elevator welcoming people, passing out candy and pushing the button to the eighth floor. When two tall men walked in, I didn’t bat an eye. One nudged the other and said, “If you don’t talk to her, I will.” His friend left the elevator, but he stayed on.
I shrugged. This guy wasn’t my type. With his short hair, ill-­fitting, baggy Old Navy jeans, white Hanes T-shirt, and Converse sneakers, he exuded a major nerd factor. But there was something sweet about Justin, and I was at church, so I had to be polite. He rode up and down with me a few times, and he seemed to be looking into my soul when we talked. He was smart and funny and had traveled the world. So I agreed to go out for coffee.

The day arrived, and we had a great time—until the check came. I went to the bathroom, and when I returned the check was still resting on the table with his half on top. “Here you go,” he said, handing me the bill. I paid my share of the $5.25 and thought, This is the last date. For a month Justin called, texted, and emailed, but I stuck to my guns. Finally he persuaded me to go out for falafel. “Let me explain,” he said. “I’m going to pay for dinner tonight. And I’m going to pay for the next dinner after that. When you told me you were a model, I assumed you were one of those beautiful women who uses guys for a fancy dinner. I don’t play that game. I do well for myself, and I’ve been burned because of it. I don’t want to go out with anyone who only has me around so I can pay for stuff.”

And just like that, I had my first experience of what it meant to communicate with a man. It was profound; all I wanted to do was keep talking to Justin. The consistency and openness was so new it felt weird. I told him this all the time: “You’re weird.”

Her with bedroom questions from you,  which she answers with her signature candor. Listen in!

GLAMOUR: What’s it really like to get to a job like that and be the only non-size-2 model? Does it ever feel like tokenism?

AG: I felt like a token in the beginning [of my career]. But now there are so many curve models—and more opportunities. I feel like a queen [on those jobs] because I’m the only one like me. I’m like, “Yes, I’m the curve ruler!” [Laughs.] At the Kors show I was the only one standing around naked in front of everyone.
GLAMOUR: That sounds like a bad dream to me…tell me about it.
AG: I ripped off my clothes, put on my Spanx, and was just hanging out. Kendall [Jenner] was right behind me obsessing over the fur I was wearing in the show. Joan [Smalls] was saying, “I want your look.” Then I put on my jersey knit dress and walked.
GLAMOUR: Speaking of nakedness, you’ve told me before that you wouldn’t ever show nipple or bush, but in this year’s SI Swimsuit Edition, there was nipple. What changed?
AG: You know, my thing is: If it’s vulgar, and it’s, like, me grabbing my breasts and showing nipple, I’m not going to do it. When I said, “I don’t do nip and bush,” I didn’t feel like I had to be specific as to what kind. So you might even see more nipple coming up. But trust me: You will never see my vagina! [Laughs.]
GLAMOUR: Have you ever had any internal qualms about your work in fashion and being traditionally Christian? About appearing so sexualized and then—
AG: And then going to church on Sunday?

GLAMOUR: Yes. How do you keep it straight?

AG: It’s a gut intuition. I ask myself, “Is this right for me, my brand, my career, and my relationship?” Doing the music video with Joe Jonas—and making out with him—was something that I talked to [my husband] Justin about before I went in. And he understood I was playing a role. There are reasons to set boundaries for yourself, but there are also reasons to keep doors open. With that video I wanted to let the world know that love comes in all sizes.
GLAMOUR: What’s it like to kiss another man when you’re married?
AG: It was a bit weird to go home after because I wanted to be like, “Babe, guess what I did today?” And Justin was like, “Do I really want to hear about you making out with another guy?”
GLAMOUR: I’m dying to know: Is Joe Jonas a good kisser?
AG: Yeah. He is. [Laughs.]
GLAMOUR: So how do you know your boundaries on set? I was once pushed to pose naked, and I didn’t know how to say no, so I did it.
AG: There was an incident on set of a campaign job when I was 17 years old—I haven’t told this story—and there was a photo assistant who was into me. He was like, “Hey, come here,” and he led me into a closet. And I was like, “What?” I thought he was going to show me something. And he pulled me in, and he pulled his penis out. And he was like, “Grab it.” And I was like, “No! That’s disgusting.” I freaked out. And thank God I was closer to the door, and I just bolted out.
GLAMOUR: I’m so sorry. Did you tell anyone at the time?
AG: No. And sure enough, I’ve seen him at jobs since. I even knew a girl he dated. I didn’t tell her because there was a voice in me that said, “Maybe he’s changed.” It was my young mentality. But I told myself, ever since that incident, that I wasn’t going to allow someone at work to manipulate what I wanted to do on set. So any image that you see out there is one that I wanted to take.






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